fbpx

My Long Distance Relationship is Making Me Crazy: How Therapy Can Help

Table of Contents

So, you’re in a long-distance relationship, huh? Welcome to the club nobody really wants to be in, but here we are, making the best of it. You started off thinking it’d be all romantic texts and cute video calls, but now you’re realizing it’s more like syncing schedules and decoding tone over text.

And let’s be real, it’s starting to drive you a bit crazy. You’re constantly checking your phone, reading into every message, and maybe even doing some social media stalking (we’ve all been there). It’s like you’re living in two different worlds, and sometimes it feels like you’re the only one trying to bridge that gap.

But before you throw your phone out the window or book a one-way ticket, let’s talk about it. Because as much as it’s making you want to pull your hair out, there’s a reason you’re still hanging on, right?

Signs that your long-distance relationship is taking a toll on your mental health

When you’re in a long-distance relationship, it’s easy to swipe aside the little things. You tell yourself it’s just the distance, but sometimes, it’s more than that. Your relationship might be straining more than just your phone’s battery life. Here’s how to tell if your long-distance relationship is sending your mental health on a rollercoaster ride without the fun screams.

Constant Mood Swings

Ever found yourself flipping from ecstatic to utterly despondent in a matter of minutes after a quick chat or, worse, the lack thereof? It’s not just you. Constant mood swings are a glaring red flag. One moment, you’re on cloud nine after a loving goodnight text, and the next, you’re questioning your entire existence because they read your message but didn’t reply immediately.

Lack of Sleep or Too Much Sleep

Whether you’re catching Z’s at odd hours to match their time zone or losing sleep over a peculiar “K” in their last text, sleep disruption is a sign. Too little or too much sleep can be your body’s SOS, indicating stress or depression creeping in. Remember when you stayed up all night just chatting away? If those sessions now leave you more exhausted than exhilarated, take note.

Obsessing Over Their Social Media

Scrolling becomes your new hobby, but not the fun kind. You’re no longer just catching up on their day. Instead, you’re dissecting every post and tag, looking for hidden meanings or, dare we say, signs of life outside of your chats. If you find yourself knee-deep in the comments section of a photo from 2014, it’s time to hit the pause button.

By recognizing these signs, you’re taking the first step toward addressing the elephant in the room: that your long-distance relationship is shaping your mental health in ways you hadn’t anticipated. It’s not about blaming the miles between you; it’s about acknowledging the impact and making sure you’re both on the same page. Remember, maintaining your well-being is just as crucial as keeping the relationship afloat.

Strategies for coping with the challenges of a long-distance relationship

Long-distance relationships can feel like riding a rollercoaster that you can’t get off. But don’t worry, there’s hope, and it starts with you mastering some coping strategies.

Communicate Regularly, But Not Obsessively. Finding the right balance in communication is key. You don’t have to glue your phone to your hand, but regular check-ins can keep the connection alive. For instance, share the high and low points of your day or send pictures of things that made you think of them.

Establish Trust. Trust is the foundation of any relationship, but in long-distance ones, it’s the glue that holds everything together. Share your feelings openly and encourage your partner to do the same. Remember, paranoia is a mood killer, so let trust be your default setting.

Maintain Shared Interests. Just because miles separate you doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy things together. Watch the same movie simultaneously and share your thoughts on it afterward. Start a book club for two. Play online games together. Shared activities can bridge the gap, keeping you connected on a deeper level.

Prioritize Visits When Possible. Nothing beats actual physical presence. Plan visits as often as your schedules and wallets allow. These meetings can recharge your relationship, creating memories that’ll fuel your connection during the times you’re apart.

Embrace Independence. While it might seem counterintuitive, spending time on your hobbies and interests outside the relationship can actually bring you closer. You’ll have more to talk about and share, strengthening your bond.

Remember, a long-distance relationship isn’t a life sentence of loneliness. With a bit of work, trust, and a lot of patience, you’ll find ways to make it less about the distance and more about the relationship.

Importance of communication in a long-distance relationship

Let’s face it, effective communication is the glue that holds your long-distance relationship (LDR) together. Without it, you’re just two people making expensive phone calls and wondering why you’re always out of sync.

In a long-distance relationship, sharing the mundane, the magnificent, and, yes, sometimes the monotonous, turns ordinary chats into your lifeline. Whether it’s texting about your day or video calling to share a smile, these moments build a bridge over the miles separating you and your partner.

Frequency and quality are key. You might think bombarding your partner with texts and calls shows you care, but there’s a fine line between attentive and smothering. Find a rhythm that works for both of you—maybe it’s a morning text to start the day, a midday check-in, and a video call at night. Here, it’s not about the quantity but the quality of your exchanges.

Sharing experiences keeps the connection alive. Watch movies together online, play games, or even cook the same recipe at the same time. This shared virtual time can help mitigate the physical distance between you.

Trust and transparency are also magnified in a long-distance relationship. It’s easy to let your imagination run wild when you’re miles apart, but regular, open communication can help quell those fears. Be honest about your feelings, your day-to-day life, and your friends. It will build a foundation of trust that’s crucial for any relationship, especially an LDR.

Finally, don’t underestimate the power of a surprise message or mail. Snail mail might seem outdated, but there’s nothing like getting a handwritten letter or a package from your significant other. It shows effort, thought, and a sprinkle of romance, reminding you both why you’re putting in the hard work.

In essence, communication in a long-distance relationship isn’t just about keeping in touch. It’s about maintaining intimacy, building trust, and creating shared experiences, albeit virtually.

Red flags to watch out for in a long-distance relationship

When your long-distance relationship starts making you question your sanity, it’s crucial to identify the red flags that signal trouble. Understanding these signs can help you navigate through the rough waters or decide it’s time to dock your ship elsewhere.

Decreased Communication

If your daily calls have dwindled to weekly check-ins, alarm bells should ring. Relationships thrive on communication, especially when you’re exploring the complexities of a long-distance relationship. Examples include:

  • Your texts go unanswered for days.
  • Video calls are as rare as a blue moon.

Lack of Transparency

When you start noticing your partner’s stories don’t add up or they’re vague about their whereabouts, trust issues start to surface. Transparency is the backbone of any relationship, more so in a long-distance one. Signs include:

  • Dodging questions about who they were out with.
  • Changing details about the same story.

Unwillingness to Make Future Plans

In a long-distance relationship, having something to look forward to can be what keeps the spark alive. If your partner continually avoids talking about future visits or significant milestones, it’s a glaring red flag. You might notice:

  • Excuses every time you bring up future visits.
  • A lack of enthusiasm when discussing future plans.

Jealousy and Possessiveness

While a hint of jealousy is normal, excessive controlling behavior isn’t healthy. It’s a glaring sign of insecurity and can strain your long-distance relationship. Examples are:

  • Getting upset when you go out with friends.
  • Demanding to always know your whereabouts.

Recognizing these red flags early on can save you from a lot of heartaches. While exploring your long-distance relationship, always trust your gut. If something feels off, it probably is. Remember, it’s better to confront these issues head-on rather than letting them fester.

Seeking support: talking to a therapist or counselor about your long-distance relationship

So, your long-distance relationship is starting to make you feel a little cuckoo. Hey, it happens. The first step in untangling those emotions? Seeking out a pro. Talking to a therapist or counselor can be a game-changer, giving you the tools and insights needed to navigate those choppy waters with a bit more grace.

Therapists bring a lot to the table: objectivity, strategies for improving communication, and ways to cope with the loneliness that can come with being miles apart. They’re like the relationship GPS you didn’t know you needed. Counselors, on the other hand, can offer more specialized advice, especially if they focus on couples or family therapy. They might introduce exercises or “assignments” for you and your partner to work on together, fostering a stronger connection even though the distance.

Discussing your long-distance relationship with a therapist might feel daunting at first. You’re essentially opening up your emotional suitcase for someone else to rummage through. But remember, it’s their job to help, not judge. They’ve seen it all: the good, the bad, and the ugly cries over poor WiFi connections during a video call. Their insights can offer a fresh perspective on things you might be too close to see clearly.

For many, the biggest hurdle is making that first appointment. But once you’re over that initial bump, the road starts to look a lot smoother. You’ll learn to communicate more effectively with your partner, understand your own needs better, and develop strategies for dealing with the unique challenges that come with a long-distance relationship. All of which can make you feel less like you’re losing your mind and more like you’re on a path to a healthier, happier partnership.

Conclusion

So there you have it. If your long-distance relationship’s driving you up the wall, remember you’re not alone. It’s okay to seek out a therapist or counselor. They’re like navigators in the choppy waters of love from afar, offering you the tools and insights to not just survive but thrive. Don’t let hesitation hold you back. Taking that step could be the game-changer you need to turn crazy into contentment. Here’s to a healthier, happier you and a stronger relationship that goes the distance—literally.

Frequently Asked Questions

Can therapy really help with long-distance relationships?

Yes, therapy can significantly help with long-distance relationships by providing insights, improving communication, helping individuals cope with loneliness, and offering specialized advice tailored to their unique situation.

What are the benefits of seeking professional help for long-distance relationships?

The benefits of seeking professional help include gaining insights into relationship dynamics, improving communication skills, coping strategies for loneliness, and receiving specialized advice to navigate the challenges specific to long-distance relationships.

Is it normal to feel hesitant about starting therapy for relationship issues?

Yes, it’s perfectly normal to feel hesitant about starting therapy for relationship issues. However, overcoming this initial hesitation can open the door to valuable insights and tools that enhance your relationship.

How can therapy provide a fresh perspective on long-distance relationships?

Therapy can provide a fresh perspective by introducing new coping strategies, helping you understand your feelings and behaviors, and offering guidance on improving communication and connection with your partner, despite the distance.

Can professional help really improve communication in a long-distance relationship?

Absolutely, professional help can greatly improve communication in a long-distance relationship by teaching both partners effective ways to express their feelings, listen actively, and understand each other’s needs and expectations better.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Felix Prasetyo is the founder and publisher at Lifengoal, covering relationships, social skills, and personal growth. Felix holds a degree in Computer Science from the University of British Columbia, and has also contributed to other media publications such as Addicted2Success.com and YogiApproved.

A Dash of Magic Newsletter

“To get good at dealing with negative experiences is to get good at dealing with life.” – Mark Manson

Table of Contents

Where should we send your FREE e-book?

Get our 47-page-short, on purpose book on creating a long-lasting relationship, improving yourself as an individual, and many more!

No spam. No BS. Unsubscribe anytime.